If you are an entrepreneur or aspiring entrepreneur, then you would know about this dilemma and the havoc it can create in your life.
Yes, it is the freedom of time and money we long for, but then we allow our fears to stop or sabotage us. Your brain sorts for pleasure or pain and it would do more to avoid pain than to go for pleasure.
Pleasure of Freedom
One of the biggest drives we have as entrepreneurs is that of freedom. To have autonomy over our time and life as a whole. To be at choice of when we work, how we work and who we work with.
Financial freedom goes hand in hand with having time freedom. Although this looks doable in theory and on a business plan, it is a bumpy road to enjoy the consistent experience of time and money freedom.
It is here where we allow our fears to distract our focus and derail our vision. It is our fears that prevent us from taking the leap to pursue our dream or even entertain the possibility of it becoming a reality.
Pain of Fear
As you know, it is not about the fear, because fear is an assumption of an illusion that only exists in your mind. It is the thought about the fear, of what mayhappen and more importantly, about what it would say about you. It comes down to what you are afraid it would say about you, if the worst would happen.
It is this pain that your brain will do anything to avoid and protect you from experiencing.
If this resonates with you, then here are some tips to deal with this effectively.
For now, hold in mind that the main cause of this is that you are taking things that happen in your life personally, especially things not going your way. This includes feedback that you see as criticism and as a personal attack against you. Or expectations not met by people or situations. In other words you are making things about you, where it is not about you, it is about the issue, situation, decision.
The only good thing about fear is that it lets you know that you are resisting the manifesting of anything good into your life. You are resisting the manifesting of your desires by focusing on the absence of it instead of the presence of it.
The absence as in the “reality” of the past and the external world instead of the presence of your desire in your inner world bringing it to the physical by your faith.
Let’s now look at the fears we experience as entrepreneurs, what they are about and how to reframe them so that they lose their emotional stronghold on you.
Fear of Failure
When you think about the concept of failing, it does not actually exist. Failure is no absolute, because on the continuum between failure and success, there are infinite degrees of failure and success, depending from which side you are looking at it. Any given degree on this continuum gives you feedback about what failed and what succeeded. Of what worked and what did not work.
Consider the notion that there is no failure, only feedback. Thomas Edison took this to heart. If you remember, he said that he did not fail a thousand times at inventing a light bulb, he discovered a thousand ways how to not create it. John Maxwell talked about failing forward and to see every failure as a steppingstone to success.
The thing is, that the road to success is not a smooth one. It is filled with challenges and obstacles and yet it is in overcoming the challenges and obstacles that you find the adventure. The adventure of discovering the powerful you who are manifesting your dream in spite of seemingly insurmountable problems.
Because it is not about achieving the goal, or grand vision, it is about the person you are becoming in the process. You are bound to fail at some things and when you can give yourself permission to fail, you will find that you start to focus on faith and joy.
So, challenge your fear of failure:
- What assumptions are you making?
- Are they true?
- Find evidence that your assumptions are not true from your own life or that of someone else.
- What is the opposite of the assumption and how does that make you feel?
- How does it change things when you think, speak and act from here?
If you take things personally:
- Ask yourself, is it about me or about the issue?
- If it is not about me, what is the feedback on the issue?
- What is working and not working?
- What are my options?
- What is my next step from here?
Fear of Success
Even if it may seem that way, success rarely, if ever, happens overnight. Success grows on you and it gives you time to grow into it.
The fear of success is again of what you are afraid it may say about you when you succeed. And what that would say to others like your partner, parents, friends. Here we are afraid of what we may lose when we succeed.
Subconsciously we have built-in safety checks. Decisions we have often made in childhood to not outshine a parent or sibling. Or the ramifications your success may have on your relationship with your partner or family.
Again, these safety-checks may be totally outdated and not relevant anymore. So when you have doubts or objections that come up in the back of your mind, explore them with curiosity and dismiss them if appropriate.
You may find that when you discuss your concerns with the relevant parties, that your assumptions are just that, assumptions that are not true.
Fear of Rejection
Fear of rejection can be associated with both failure and success and are also based on assumptions. You experience rejection when you take it personally when someone says no to you.
For example, if someone says no to your services or products that you are selling, you take it that they are saying no to you. Or when someone gives you feedback, you see it as criticism and rejection.
Challenge this fear of rejection with the questions stated above about taking things personally. You will most probably find that when someone says no, it is not about you, but about the product or service or issue at hand.
When you make that separation, you are free to explore feedback that will give you insight what to approve on.
It’s only when the envisaged pleasure of freedom is more important than the pain of fear that we will decide to go for our dreams in the face of fear.
Beyond that, this is a dilemma that you as an entrepreneur continuously face in everything that you do and it influences every decision you make. More than that, the energy vibration of pleasure and fear are powerful in attracting to you the experiences that match your energy.
Make sure that your exercise your choices and make your decisions from the place of pleasure of what it would give you versus from the place of fear and lack.